Days

Where are all oyur friends at night like this?

At night when your world fall apart?

And once again you gonna find out something

you already learn very good.

It's up on you.

Every single thing.

Every unpicked call.

Every while You try to try hard

for "I'm sorry I don't have time."

Is it friendship to just say:

"I'm sorry we already talked about this."

In such an annoyed  way.

Is it okay to say
"Everyone do it like this."?

Or to apologize because you're

not brave enough and try to do something to undo

the things you take as mistakes?

Because you can say "I can never undo."?

Or are friends people which are coward

to tell their crush they're with you again in three days

when before they said "I didn't see you for months."
Just for them to be jealous?

Maybe I'm just heartless to others,

when I always took my friends as precious.

I never cannot understand

"My boyfriend forbid me to go to concert, he's jealous."

Maybe I just loved less.

Or maybe I just think different.

And today I thought again
"How hard it should be to get rid of problems?

To leave everything behind and end the rest?"

Am I coward that I continue to live?

Maybe just have too big imagination...

...when I see something in my future path,

when I just see nothing there.

Is it right to lie myself,

to draw forest in path which is in reality

just long grey hall which probably don't end by light?

It's probably insane to still believe.

Belive your dreams when right when you

glued last piece back they got crushed again.
Or maybe just stupid...

Unfortunatelly...beying all of this, or something other...

I cannot just give up.

Once I started and it cannot forget it in the end.

One you try it, it'll always leave trace in your heart and your life.

Maybe I just cannot end.

I cannot give up.

And cannot stop trust myself.
But can it be because I never forgot how to be

Egoist

?

In the end this sounds pretty selfish...

but actually it's not.

Just my thought during harsh while.

My air castles crashed down.

It's okay...I already started to build

Châteu close to the ruins...

Because I have dream for too long

To simply give up...

And my life goes on.

My apologies~ But I'm here!!!

As I wrote last time, I'm still not dead!

There is not so much things

which will really kill me...

except silver bullet and Asagi without make up. (lol)

Well in any ways, I'm sorry for inactivity.

I should probably explain it, right?

Well...today it's right 7 days that 

I'm in my new flat.

Last week I moved back to the Prague.
Not woth all my things yet

and even that I worked hard

and clean all that damn mess here,

still it's not in condition when I wanna make photos.

So maybe later.

And before I was quite...how to say it?

Stressed?

Depressed?

Upset?

I don't know myself how to say/write it.

But now it's quite better.
I just feel kind of lonely here, 

since my flat mate don't gonna be here for while.

So boring for now.
And also no one have time to go out now.

Pfff...Boring, really boring.

Actually I even thought it'll be 1st May

next Friday...lol

Am I really that confused?
∑(O_O；)Shock！！

And today I so want to go out...and don't just sit here!
But I don't like to be alone.
But come on!!!
I knew it whole time!
*sad smile*

But I guess it's okay!
Soon I'll find work and have less free time
again so it'll not look like I have much time again!
I'll not be so bored I hope!

Let's hope in future!
(*･∀･)／♡＼(･∀･*)

So bad my best friend live so far!

Well...

Stop whinning, let's go out!

Let's buy something nice and eat cake!

Let's make myself my life better!!!

Btw. I played with filters yesterday.

Which one you like more? (^o^)

See you later.
I hope I can write more today (^o^)/